hard right! HARD RIGHT!!

well. nobody ever said anything about full scale massive deployment/ all out war/ shock and awe/ rapid advancement. i was nicely content in letting it be a more stealth/recon mission. of course things took a bad turn. some blithering idiot got spotted. bang bang bang. my troops died. like shit.

my adamantium hull was dented and worn. my power fist badly needed servicing and cleansing after smiting the daemons of slaanesh in the toilet last saturday. my psycannon was running out of ammo fast. things did not look very good.

i needed help. and i wasnt ashamed to ask for reinfocements or additional intelligence reports that better described the situation. i quickly composed a dossier of information in a harmless postcard that was meant for the most reliable of my inside contacts. all i had to do was to give it that insider. the grim faced judge. that was my last hope it seemed in begging for a cease fire. something went wrong in the delivery. my arm just froze in ice cold fear. the dossier still lies in my file. i had decided (well, it was really my fear that did the deciding).

of course the retreat wasnt so easy either. there i was walking down the relatively dark corridor with a few neutral companions in hopes of blending in and escaping undetected. i was wary but optimistic. fat hope.
ENEMY SPOTTED!! RANGE TEN FEET! ETA 5 SECONDS!!

omg. what should i do? what should i do? was i spotted yet? if i wasnt i would be very soon. into the stairs? no, still too visible. aha. i spotted my salvation.

hard right! HARD RIGHT!!! damn you! your incompetency will be the end of me!
where? WHERE?
into the toilet!

bang! i collided pretty painfully with one of the neutral companions. but that did not stop my headlong charge and i smashed through the wooden doors. then i forgot the resolution i made last saturday and prompty went about using the facilities. phew. that was a close one. there was still hope of escaping alive.

i carefully sneaked into the mess halls where i patiently waited for 2pm when i could collect the necessary documents that would permit me to leave that blasted facility. i scanned the area for my inside agents. i found him but he was not quite what i expected.

b: are you the hedge?
me: eh. what?
b: come on man. are you the hedge?
me: i dont know what you're talking about. i am not a hedge?
b: eh come on lah. be a man.

if you are as puzzled as i was, i dont blame you. the time was right. the clock had ticked 1:55 pm. my resistance comrade had sat down to tie her shoelaces or something. and then it happened. i tried to look as calm as possible. enemy contacts passed within five paces of me. one smiled (in what intentions i have no idea). the other, gave a stone faced look. half smirking half judging (or you could say i have no idea either).

BANG!
Sniper! OWowOw! me arm!
What! whats wrong with you?
Fool! next time, shoot yourself and rid me of your stupidity. now stop gawking around and help me up damn it.

after a few more hours of sneaking around, whatwas left of me finally reached the demilitarised zone. a temporary respite in a year full of struggles.

oh. surely i deserve a promotion to a gk dreadnaught, brother TheVarnus? i have stared down the face of chaos and left with my sanity intact. lol.